Speaker: Andrea
What did life look like before END? What made you decide to work with us?
Andrea: Right now I deal with research related to artificial intelligence systems. I work for a big tech company. And so in terms of what life looked like before doing the program, let's see, I guess I would say that, well, first of all, I I'm in my late forties, and hadn't dated for about 10 years. A lot of the focus was, being put on caring for aging family members. So really not too much time, energy or space for me and what I wanted. So why I decided to get involved in the program is because I knew I needed to make a change. I had always imagined myself being married and with children, certainly by this point in my life. And that hadn't happened.
What are the three biggest benefits from working in END?
Andrea: So my involvement in the program has been nothing short of life-changing, and I do not say that lightly. Really, like my whole perspective on who I am and my place in this world has changed so dramatically since I did this program. And obviously the the focus is on dating. But I almost feel like every human being should go through something like this, an experience like this, because it's been so transformational for me to be involved. So it's hard for me to sort of pinpoint what the biggest benefits are. But I would say, first of all the lessons I have learned are allowed and I'm still in the process of learning, right? But basically, they have allowed me to be free.
What was your biggest breakthrough while in the program?
Andrea: One of the biggest breakthroughs I've had while in the program is in learning about the different relationship, attachment styles of anxious, avoidant, and secure, and learning that I am more aligned with an anxious attachment style. The breakthrough on that was having a name for that, but then also having a framework to understand my behavior and to understand why I've been picking certain types of people in particular – you know, men who are avoidant. And the beautiful thing about this is before I didn't have a name for it or framework for understanding it, so I just felt like I was this broken person who was completely and totally incompetent in relationships and sort of doomed to keep repeating the same kinds of mistakes over and over again and not really understanding why I was doing it or how to fix it. And so by having that framework of these different relationship styles, I'm able to understand that I am not broken that there's nothing wrong with me and that there are things I can do that there's some shifts and beliefs I need to make, and can make.
What would you tell others who are thinking about joining the program?
Andrea: When I was first thinking about joining the program, I knew I needed some kind of help and I thought that the program could be helpful, but I did have some concerns around the resources that would be required to do the program. So first of all the time, the emotional investment if you will and then also, you know, frankly the financial investment and I was just kind of like this is so crazy, you know, I saw this ad on YouTube originally for this program, and that's how I learned about it and then, you know, followed up and got more information. But I was just kind of like this is insane. So am I really going to do this? You know, I didn't know anyone directly who had done the program. I wasn't really sure if it was going to be worth it. And if I could go back in time and talk to myself, I would say it is 110% worth it. It is absolute, it is worth the time you're gonna put in. It's worth the emotional energy you're gonna put in. It's gonna be worth the financial investment that you'll be making in this.
Is there anything else you'd like to add about your experience in END?
Andrea: I am so thankful that I participated in this program. I am also feeling so blessed that I've been able to have this experience. This experience has just really changed my life and I have this feeling that when I'm older and I look back over this journey that I've had throughout my lifetime that I will sort of have two big arcs and the first one will be life before this program and this big second one will be life after this program.
